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Down a level or two . . . my fingers are too clumsy

 

I couldn’t drag myself out to face people today.
I don’t want to write — I’m too much of a bloody nothing.

I’m talking secretly to a friend in my mind.
Oh God I wish he would actually appear.
He is God and human and lifts me from all my weaknesses.
Man it’s so beautiful living with him inside my mind always, but the outside world comes in and he’s shut out.
I’m finding it harder all the time to cross back for such non-realities as work and material existence.

John Mayall is two Saturdays away now and I just don’t know what he’ll do to me. Front row seats.


My protests against society’s habits have reached the point where I stay home weekends because everyone else goes out.

Oh God what am I to do with my life?
It won’t be work, suburban living or limitations of any sort ever again.
I’ll grow till I am more God than human. Until I am eternal and infinite, living beyond time and place.

How do you find others that can dig it when to socialise betrays your beliefs?

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Down a level or two I am still as certain as ever that I am really a musician.
When I listen to a brilliant musician I feel an affinity with him but anger that I am not actually him.
My mind can play and feel it just as he can but my fingers are too clumsy. Whether I was previously a great musician or whether I’ll be one in the next life, I don’t know.
But more likely, I AM a brilliant musician somewhere else in the world right now.

And God if YOU can’t dig what I feel you’ll see how hard it is for me to find someone who does.

The old world is exploding.
The children who are coming do not hate, war doesn’t exist in their minds and nor does greed (i.e. politics), nor material extravagance nor status.

Right now in this country people are being jailed for saying “bullshit”, for being naked, for having sex outside marriage, for smoking grass. Give Ireland Back to the Irish is banned.
People are run out of the country for saying “fuck”.

And meanwhile the Government says “join the Army, learn to kill your enemy”.

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